“I just want to find my passion” or “I feel like I’m lacking purpose in my life”. We’ve all heard these, and maybe even said them ourselves. A few months ago, I had a conversation with a friend on the topic of finding your passion or finding purpose in life. It got me thinking, how have I worked through this in my life? Here’s what I came up with.
Experiences
The journey to becoming your best self, finding your passion or purpose in life, starts with experiences. And no, I don’t mean reading books, listening to podcasts, watching Youtube videos, studying theories, or watching someone else do it. Sure – those can all help a little, but what I really mean is taking action and doing it yourself. It’s about stepping out of your comfort zone and engaging with life in a way that challenges you, excites you, and sometimes even scares you. Real growth comes from doing, not thinking, reading, watching, or listening.
Reflection
As you have more and more experiences, you have more to reflect on. Did you enjoy that experience? Was it hard? Why was it hard? What parts of it did you love? What did you hate? Reflecting to me means writing. Journaling, tracking, drawing, anything – just get it out of your head.
I overthink. If I don’t write, or get things out of my head, I think the same thoughts over and over. I won’t make progress on my thoughts, I’ll just think the same thoughts, replay the same conversations, over and over again. One of my deepest fears is ‘just floating through life’. I believe spending more time reflecting helps you avoid this feeling.
Clarity
Reflection leads to clarity. Clarity on what truly matters to you—your interests, passions, your dislikes, your goals, your priorities, your relationships, your vision for your life.
When I reflect and write, I gain clarity. Writing also allows me to leave, go to sleep, move on with my day, then revisit my thoughts weeks or months later. I can read through them, then pick up right where I left off. No longer do I overthink.
Clarity takes you back to the beginning and leads to refined experiences. Take your career path for example, each job you’ve had has helped you reflect and gain clarity on what you like / dislike, then you end up trying something else and refining your future experiences.
Best Version of Yourself
After years of following this process, having a ton of experiences, reflecting on those experiences, gaining clarity, refining your experiences, etc. you will ultimately get closer and closer to becoming the best version of yourself. Each experience, positive or negative, brings you closer to becoming your best self.
I encourage you to reflect—what experiences can you do this week that will lead you to your best self? Is there anything holding you back from trying something new today? Do you need to take more time to reflect and gain clarity?
Charlie Coppola
Below is the graphic I created to visualize this process. Let me know your feedback! What’d I get right? What’d I get wrong?
